Does everyone have a soul mate or is that just poetry and detritus from medieval French writers?

If there truly is sucker born every minute, howcum I can't find anyone to give me oral? Am I on the wrong continent or what?

I like Sheryl Crow's music and I think she still looks kinda' hot, but why the fuck does everybody think so? She's like the female Lenny Kravitz....

If Bolton got confirmed as US ambassador to the U.N., don't you think the world would collectively give Bolton the middle finger and bare their ass to his bushy face on a weekly basis as a matter of principal?

BTW, what's the difference between an isolationist and a xenophobe? One wants to be left alone and the other will kill everyone else to be left alone.

How soon before we do away with all media players altogether and just plug in directly to our heads?

There's a laser version of sound waves that beams sounds directly to one person's ear from any distance. How long before Madison Avenue starts abusing that for advertising?

The BIG ROCK in the SKY is finally comin', you've got two hours before it slams into the Earth and makes mudpies out of everybody. Waddya' gonna' do? Pray to God, make peace with everyone or raise hell like Gomorrah?

What's the point of a nine inch dick unless you work in porn? Nobody appreciates it in real life if you're unattractive, have halitosis, can't talk to girls (or anybody else) or if you're poor as mud and can't back up the equipment with bling bling bling.